The most embarrassing sexual injuries in the world
These are the worst injuries you could ever go to the hospital with.
After the announcement that a student teacher had to go to the hospital for a vibrator removed from her back, The Sun made a list of the worst sex-related injuries.
Because of course, there is nothing worse than having to explain to people in the emergency room how you got that deodorant … there.
A real circus of horrors
Daniel Blackner – who performs in the Circus of Horrors as Captain Dan the Dwarf Demon – had to go to hospital after a Henry vacuumed his penis.
While it may sound like a sexual experience gone awry, the explanation behind the accident is much more bizarre.
As part of the Circus of Horrors show, Daniel attaches a vacuum cleaner to his penis and pulls the device across the stage.
Right before he took the stage, the special attachment the 42-year-old uses to connect to the vacuum cleaner loosened.
So in a last ditch attempt to keep the show going, he tried mending the broken attachment with extra strong glue.
But in a hurry to get ready for the show, he only let it dry for 20 seconds, instead of 20 minutes.
This required Daniel to travel to the Royal Edinburgh Infirmary to remove Henry from his crown jewels.
Carved in stone
You don’t have to be a genius to understand that the human body and concrete don’t mix.
But tell the couple who decided it would be a good idea to experiment with pouring concrete mixture into each other’s anus.
Deciding to take the bedroom up a notch, a 20-year-old man from North Carolina asked his partner to pour concrete on his butt.
Four hours later, the couple visited A&E after one complained of abdominal pain.
According to the medical report, the couple had to explain later that the man with concrete in his anus asked his partner to stir up a batch of concrete before asking him to pour it into his rectum through a funnel.
Power tools + sex toys = bad idea
A couple from Maryland had the terrible idea of mixing sex toys with an electric saw.
In what appears to be an obvious turn of events, the saw, being an extremely sharp power tool, cut the sex toy before injuring the woman.
The 27-year-old was then rushed to hospital after suffering some pretty nasty injuries.
A hoarse Trojan cough
A 26-year-old Cameroonian woman went to see her doctor after suffering from a rather unpleasant cough for a few weeks.
The woman came to the doctors, believing she was suffering from appendicitis, but upon closer inspection, the doctor found that the woman had in fact inhaled a condom during oral sex with her partner.
After swallowing the condom, he got stuck in his appendix, forcing doctors to operate and remove his appendix.
Sliding in the bathroom
According to a sub-Reddit, this is one of the most common excuses when people walk into A&E with foreign objects lodged behind their backs.
As Spectacular Mustard Redditor, who works as an emergency nurse in the United States, explains, a man arrived at the hospital with a can of deodorant embedded in his buttocks and attempted to pass it off as a freak accident.
“As an emergency nurse… you tell us you’ve slipped back, but we know what happened,” spectacularemustard wrote.
“We always know. Just like the guy last week who slipped on a box of deodorant after getting out of the shower.
“My God, I wonder what he was doing all lubricated on the floor in a position to fit your rectum perfectly?” “
Another pretty serious, but also very funny, accident that was on the thread came from Redditor Sin-D-Lite who said: “I was on my back on a table with my head hanging over the edge of the table while my partner and I had sex.
“The table collapsed as it got a little rougher, he fell on top of me and was fine, I hit the stone floor with the back of my head.
“I told the nurse that I had slipped and was falling backwards…”
Perhaps the worst of all.
Julio Macias Gonzalez, 17, from Mexico City, has died of an injury sustained during sexual intercourse.
The girl’s boyfriend gave her a love bite that caused a blood clot, which then traveled to her brain, causing her to have a stroke and ultimately death.